There are times to ask things, and times not to ask.
When it comes to a first date or the first few messages on a dating site, there are a lot of questions that are off limits.
Here are the top 7 questions you should NEVER ask women on a first date or on a dating site – not if your want a chance of a second date.
Don’t Ask – How come your last relationship didn’t work out?
Probably because she was just as much an ass as you were in yours.
If you don’t want an answer like that, don’t ask such a wrong-minded question.
Leave her past and exes out of the first few encounters.
Don’t Ask – Do you want to settle down?
Everyone wants to settle down eventually – even if they swear they don’t want to now – it’s part of the process of getting older.
This rates as the kind of vapid question that sounds deep, means nothing and is incredibly boring.
Don’t Ask – How do you feel about (sex act)
Don’t talk sex the first time you interact.
It will immediately put you into the category of a troll and get you blocked, online and in real life.
Don’t Ask – Are you good with kids?
Oh no. Never ask this on a first date or during the first few messages on a dating site.
First of all, it sends the message that you aren’t interested in her as a person.
Second of all, it sounds like you are just shopping for a nanny.
Don’t Ask – How much do you like to party?
As soon as a woman hears this she is going to immediately think you have a problem, or that you are ragingly immature.
Even if you are only 18, this is no question to ask the first time you meet a woman anywhere.
Don’t Ask – What do you think of (political topic)?
On the first date – just stay away from politics.
Why would you want to start an argument?
Even if you agree, all it is going to do is get everyone’s defenses up.
Politics don’t matter when you are just meeting.
Don’t Ask – Don’t you want to do something more (exciting, fulfilling, well-paying etc.)?
The underlying message here is that you don’t think they are exciting or living a very worthwhile life.
This is a great way to have a door slammed on your face – the best part is you won’t even understand why it happened.
Phrasing a question in this way is a fine example of a passive aggressive approach to communication.
So what can you ask about instead?
Here are some ideas for questions that will be sure to get her interest –
- What was the best vacation that you ever went on?
- Do you have a show, movie or book that you always return to?
- Who would be your ideal non-romantic roommate/
- Do you think that you will want the same things in life 20 years from now?
- Who is your hero?
- What sport do you wish you could be a pro player at?
The idea behind these questions is they are about discovering more about her, and not about defining her by her past or argumentative issues.
When you are first meeting someone you want to find out more about what they desire and dream of in life – that gives you an idea of where they are going with themselves.
The past comes out, but later once there is a reason for revealing what may be vulnerable details.
Politics are just about the surest way to get moved into the friend zone fast, so stay away from that.